How Not To Do It

http://booksandpals.blogspot.com/2011/03/greek-seaman-jacqueline-howett.html

That gave me a laugh when I saw it for the first time. It’s not the review itself, either- it’s her reaction. (But then I felt bad because she probably regrets that now. Don’t be too harsh on her.)

This is how not to do it. 

The review wasn’t even that bad. He basically said he liked the story, it just had some grammar errors. 

DO: Swallow your pride, thank them for the review, and move on. They’re (most likely) doing this for free, you know. 

DON’T: Throw a hissy fit and get defensive. 

Same goes for rejection letters. Once you get a reputation as uncooperative, it circulates. Plus, you’ll probably look back on whatever you’ve said in anger and regret it. 

It doesn’t matter if they’ve “insulted” your baby. 

And DO NOT cite other reviews that contain glowing praise. Really. It looks unprofessional. Please remember that writing is a business, too- if you threw a hissy fit and curse at a superior who’s turned you down for a promotion or something similar, how likely are you to get a promotion in the future? Heck, you might even get fired. 

Just swallow your initial anger and realize that maybe, just maybe, any criticism is justified. Don’t end up like Ms. Howett, please. 

The Power Of Daydreaming

I’ve heard that people spend up to 30 percent of their day daydreaming- or at least not concentrating on what they’re doing. It’s also been found that daydreamers who realize that they’re daydreaming are more creative. 

Let’s put this together, writers: what if that 30 percent was spent plotting, or working out plot kinks?

Demanding? Yes. Rewarding? Definitely. 

If we all spent at least one day where every time we caught our minds wandering, we started plotting instead, the writing itself would be a piece of cake. I’ve been doing this for a while now- if I find myself daydreaming, I start plotting. It really does work. 

If you’re really stuck, then just do this: whatever situation you’re living in your head at the moment when you catch yourself, put a character in it instead. See what your main character or side characters would do. (It’s interestingand character development. A win-win.)

Try it out and see. You never know- the solution to that plot knot of yours may just be a daydream away.

Ways To Annoy A Literary Agent

(For funny responses, see http://slushpilehell.tumblr.com/)

• Start off by saying “This is going to need a lot of editing…”
• Tak lyk thiz. (If you understood that, good job.)
• Say your mother found the book amazing. 
• Say that the book will be the next bestseller. 
• Cite J.K. Rowling, Stephenie Meyers, J.R.R. Tolkein, and Sarah Dessen as authors whose books yours resembles. 
• Say that it has “great potential to be a movie”
• Tell the agent that your book is 300,000 words. 
• Putting “Dear Mr/Mrs” at the top of your query
• Plead with the agent not to put it in the slush pile. 
• Threaten the agent. 
• Say “Here’s my number when you decide you want to work with me: xxx-xxx-xxxx. Also, I demand no less than a seven-figure contract.”

Any other ideas?

Wattpad Vs. Inkpop

I’ve been browsing a few teen writing sites, and by far inkpop is my favorite. Here’s a comparison between Wattpad (apparently the most popular) and inkpop:

UPLOADING

Wattpad has an upload-by-chapter feature for books as opposed to inkpop’s 10,000-words-first approach. Personally I like being able to upload the chapters separately and immediately better, but then again inkpop’s rule for books might make you want to write more. It just depends on the person, I guess. 

COMMUNITY

They both have forums, but for me, I prefer inkpop’s. The Wattpad ‘Clubs’ might be confusing to people at first, and plus, the threads beside the promo threads tend to get drowned out. Not that there isn’t a lot of promotion going on in inkpop, but there’s more threads for socializing and such. 

QUALITY

For the quality of the majority of the stories on the sites, I prefer inkpop. Wattpad’s “What’s Hot” list is somewhat of a joke sometimes; it’s well known for its multitude of cliches and similar plots (here are some well known ones: stories where a vampire falls for a human, stories about werewolf imprinting [don’t even get me started on that one], kidnappers and their hostages falling for each other, literal ‘boy-next-door’ stories, and so on.) The quality of the writing is, well… sometimes it’s pretty bad. I like Wattpad, though, because it’s fun to find the gems that just don’t get recognized, unfortunately. 

Inkpop, however… let’s put it this way: if you don’t want competition and consider yourself a serious writer, go to Wattpad. Almost every story I’ve read on inkpop is amazing. A lot are publishing- worthy. Actually, someone from inkpop recently got published by HarperCollins (the ones who sponsor inkpop), I believe. 

CRITIQUING

There are some serious critiquers on Wattpad, though you’ll likely recieve a line or two of standard, glowing praise. There are people like that on inkpop, too, but mostly people there know how to give good feedback. Maybe we just need to teach Wattpaders how to give helpful feedback. Hmm. 

EASE OF NAVIGATION

I’m used to both sites but I hear from newbies that Wattpad’s a lot easier to navigate. Personally I find the orange disorienting, but most agree that Wattpad’s easier to navigate. I like Inkpop’s newsfeed, but at the same time I like the layout of Wattpad’s home page, disorienting or not. 

RANKINGS

Inkpop uses picks for a ranking system. The more picks a book (or short story, poem, essay, you get the point) gets, the higher its ranking. If you pick books that are trending, your ranking will go up. You can see how that might get corrupted, though; in the past, it has been, but for the most part it’s a pretty nice way. 

Wattpad uses votes, which are kind of like picks, only you can vote for anything at any time while inkpop limits you to five picks per twenty-four hours. Also, on Wattpad, the most popular on the homepage are ranked by genre, which I kind of like. The thing is, though, people have been known to put things as a different genre than what it is so it would have less competition. There’s good and bad in both systems. 

So that’s my comparison. Personally I prefer inkpop (partially because I was on that first, and partially because I got annoyed with the text-talk grammar and cliche-ness of some Wattpad stories.) It’s a toss-up, though, depending on what you place the most emphasis on. Which would you prefer?

http://punkclassicartist.tumblr.com/

Great Links For Writers (Part One)

Here are some links I've found to great posts for writers:
 http://nailyournovel.wordpress.com/2011/04/24/how-to-make-your-most-ordinary-scene-interesting/
http://ow.ly/4BMBz
10 Things Teenage Writers Should Know About Writing →
Query Shark →
Why Ask Why?
slushpilehell.tumblr.com

PLACES TO SHARE WRITING →

inkpop

That's all for now, folks. 

Writer Boot Camp

I’m going to tell you a secret: if you’re going to be the writer in your dreams (the one banging away at a laptop with a book deal and billions of dollars), you need to write every day. Even if it’s just a few words. That’s what events like National Novel Writing Month are all about- just getting you to be a consistent writer. 

If you were learning, say, piano, you’d have to practice it often, right? Writing’s the same way. You can’t sit and wait for inspiration. (Inspiration is an excuse, really.) You just have to start writing something, be it stupid or unrelated to your current project. Writing prompts online can help. A good way to do this is keeping a daily journal. What better to write about than yourself? You can rant, rave, do whatever you want, just make sure you’re not one of the people who sit twiddling their thumbs, waiting for their Muse to show up and hand them a finished novel/script/short story. 

Force yourself to crank something out, and you’ll find that it helps. There are posts devoted to ways to get yourself writing in the NaNoWriMo forums. Don’t be lazy. Write daily. Practice makes perfect! (At least, as close to perfect as possible.)

http://punkclassicartist.tumblr.com/

Always Ask Why

Here’s a good post on this subject: Why Ask Why?

Take a look at your current plot or plot ideas. If you can think of a simpler way for your characters to do some of the things in it, there’s a problem. And if you can’t think of a viable reason for some of the things they do, there’s an even bigger problem. 

But it’s brilliant! you may say. 

No. No, it’s not. Readers will always be asking why, so you should too. Believe me, there can be nothing more annoying than a story with a bunch of implausible events. People are going to take the easy way out, so if your characters don’t then that’s probably something you need to fix. 

You should think like a reader when you look over your story. Think of things they might see. 

Sorry to say that your character’s brilliant ninja wall-climb heist may be useless if they could have done it an easier way. 

(Of course, this doesn’t apply to action movies, since we all love to watch someone ninja wall-climb, right?)

http://punkclassicartist.tumblr.com/